Jan 16th, 2012, Richard and I will be celebrating our 35th Anniversary. I think that’s a pretty good accomplishment in this day and age considering I know couples who stay together less time than the warranty on their appliances. I asked my husband yesterday (when he purchased his lottery ticket), “If you win all those millions, don’t you want to trade me in for a new wife?” He said, “Why on earth would I do that?” looking at me as if I had just asked him to give away his favorite shirt with all the old cars on it!
Sometimes young people ask me my secret for a happy marriage. I wrote a story about that a while ago.
I think one of the relationship problems in today’s world is couples have very high and sometimes unreasonable expectations. Keep your expectations simple and life will be happier. My husband and I were watching a television show about a young couple purchasing their first home. It’s called Property Virgins. The wife was vetoing every house because the master bathrooms didn’t have two sinks. “I need MY space!” she whined. My husband and I were laughing because (in our first house) we were happy just to have a bathroom in our bedroom that didn’t have to be shared with our 4 kids. That was real luxury to us. The poor husband on the show kept trying to remind his wife that they only had a certain amount of money to spend. My very wise husband said, “I give that marriage six months!”
I think the most successful marriages are the ones where the spouses are also really good friends. Where a simple act of kindness or a smile can be his or her way of saying, “I love you!” Where the person doesn’t do a disappearing act when you are so sick you can’t hold your head up or you’ve just received sad news and you need a shoulder to cry on.
I think the secret for a long lasting marriage is fireworks that make you say, “Wow!”… an unconditional commitment of love and waking up next to your spouse (even 35 years later) thinking, ” I am one lucky person!”
That’s what I will be thinking on January 16th…